As I always say, “Stereotypes are everywhere.” There are stereotypes in both reader appreciation and blogger appreciation. Today I would like to tell you about 5 stereotypes many bloggers have when it comes to blogger appreciation that stems from readers towards the bloggers. These 5 points can either make or break relationships that one may have with each and every individual reader. That means the stereotypes you are about to read do exist, though they may exist in a nature other than the stereotypical description that I will also describe for each point.

For each stereotype, I will first list the actual non-threatening reasons for which a reader may appear to be not appreciating you, and then I will list some reasons due to which a reader may actually not like you, thus giving the rise to such stereotypes. I call these 5 points stereotypes instead of myths: a myth cannot be verified easily or else it will not be a myth, though a stereotype is a broader generalization based on observing only a few people or situations where what the stereotype generalizes may be true.

5 Stereotypes of Blogger Appreciation

1. Unsubscribing from your blog’s RSS feeds

   Just because someone unsubscribes from your blog does not mean that they are your enemy. That means your relationship with anyone may not be affected simply because they are not subscribers to your blog. Your relationship with them is probably on a level other than your blog, and thus they may simply be unsubscribing from your blog for reasons other than hating you, like not wanting to subscribe to any online RSS feeds, not wanting to read blogs and thus saving time, not being interested in certain topics you write, visiting your blog daily and thus eliminating the need to have a subscription to your site.

   Now, you should also note that in some cases, a person unsubscribing from your blog may be sending you a strong message. I have done this myself, including last week: if a blogger does not appreciate her or his readers or does something wrong that affects me directly, I unsubscribe from their blog updates and feeds. They may or may not notice. To me it does not matter whether or not they notice my unsubscription, as I unsubscribe to send a message and to also eliminate the source that may be causing some issue for me.

2. Stop leaving a comment on your blog

   Many times, I will get bored of commenting or will feel like not commenting on certain blogs or all blogs. I have had some bloggers ask me if I do not like something on their blog or their behavior that prompted me to stop commenting on their blogs. I always say that I try to comment when I feel like it, and when I can, literally: I have not commented on Simonne’s blog in probably a long time. That does not mean I hate her blog or want to break ties with her; it just means that I have not gotten around to commenting, or that I am enjoying reading these days more than commenting.

   You should also note that in many cases, not commenting can be another strong signal that someone may be breaking ties with your blog, if any such ties existed. You have to realize from time to time, if not all the time, what your actions may be doing to affect other people. Such a realization can tell you whether or not someone’s act of not commenting on your site stems from a simple decision to not comment or a simple decision to boycott commenting on your site, or maybe even something else.

3. Leaving disagreeing comments on your blog

   Many people, if not the majority, assume that any disagreement means a personal attack. I like to think on the contrary. I do not like having friends who have the exact same interests and who agree to everything I believe in. That does not mean I want my friends to disagree with me for the purpose of disagreeing: that means I want everything to think everything on their own. Similarly, I usually notice a lot of online people feeling offended if someone leaves a disagreeing comment. Many times people may say something that they think is right without wanting to prove you wrong, since they may simply be comfortable posting on your site and may assume that any different opinion will not hurt your relationship with them. In such cases, it can be premature to let the relationship with a reader or a commentor get affected, simply because you do not like the fact that they thought differently than you.

   Now, as usual, many times a disagreeing comment can be a sign that someone feels strongly against what you may be wanting to imply or say or do, or what you have already implied or said or done. In such cases, responding to the disagreeing comment in a normal manner in order to address the topic at hand and not the comment at hand can help a lot, as many people may feel that you attacking their comments means that you are attacking them directly. Notice the trends of the disagreeing comments that come from the same user, see what topics that user disagrees with, see how and why the user disagrees, and so on. Analyzing or at least noticing such trends and behavior can help you realize what aspects of your behavior and blogging may be causing the other person to disagree.

4. Commenting on competing blogs

   Jealousy is a bad thing according to the majority, if not 99.99%, of the world. Today I would like to briefly point out some of the bad side-effects of jealousy. Seeing a reader blog on a competing blog can make us assume that the reader is running over to the other blog. The reader may simply be more interested in the content the other blogger is producing and may not be less interested in what you are producing. The reader may also be simply trying new things, though you may assume that the reader has been seduced by the other blogger, and thus that reader is now going to be someone else’s loyal commentor and not yours. In reality, all that may be happening is that the reader may actually be only commenting on the other blog for the short term: many people comment on new blogs that they find interesting on a heavier-than-usual basis, only to slow down their commenting trend on those new blogs once enough time has passed.

   You should also keep in mind that the reader may have actually run over to the other side. The other blogger may have shown more respect to the reader, or you may have pushed the reader away from you by producing content that the reader has started to find boring or by not respecting the reader enough. You may also have changed your blog completely, like changing from talking about making people happy to talking about ways to earn money, which many people also find to be equivalent to being happy. However, the reader in question may find such a change unacceptable, and may be moving on. In many cases, there is usually no harm in frankly and politely e-mailing the other person and inquiring as to how they are and as to the reason they have not communicated with you through your blog, if you really want to figure out what may be going on.

5. Stopping private communication with you

   A reader may have privately communicated with you via comments, e-mails, instant messages or through some other form. If a reader simply stops their private communication with you, there could be a myriad of reasons for such behavior. The reader may have some other priorities in their offline life than to regularly interact with you. The reader may also feel that online communication is not what they are looking for. The reader may have found more people to talk to, which means that they may not necessarily be ignoring you, and may instead be simply talking to a lot of people and not having the time to communicate on a private level with you anymore.

   Stopping personal communication may also be one of the strongest signs that someone is not talking to you because you may have done something wrong according to their perspective. You may have done something to offend or disappoint the other person. Remember: communicating on a private level is a huge deal for many people. It is a huge deal for me. Thus, many elements in private communication may be stronger than similar elements in public communication. Since you have already communicated with someone privately, it can be good in many cases to actually communicate directly with the other person and ask them the reason of their silence.

Stereotype or reality? The answer is “Both, and it depends.“

The above are 5 of the many daily stereotypes that many bloggers face when it comes to readers. From unsubscribing from RSS feeds to not commenting to disagreeing to commenting elsewhere to not communicating with you on a private level, a reader may not be around your site much due to a lot of reasons. These reasons can comprise of both reasons revolving around the reader simply wanting to try something new and not disliking what you have, to reasons revolving around the reader wanting to try something new because of disliking you and disliking what you have.

I hope this helps you in realizing whether or not any reader of yours is being appreciated by you, and whether or not a reader feels appreciated well enough for the time and energy they spend on your blog.

Question for you

Which type of blogs have to deal with and keep in mind such stereotypes and their analysis more in order to either maintain or eliminate friendships and reader relationships: small blogs where bloggers usually know every reader on a personal level, or large blogs where bloggers usually do not know majority of the readers on a personal level?

Please let me know what you think. Thank you for reading.

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